“In over 20 years of private practice, I have seen people of every age and background face every manner of heartbreak, and what I’ve learned is this: when your heart is broken, the same instincts you ordinarily rely on will time and again lead you down the wrong path. You simply cannot trust what your mind is telling you.” — Guy Winch, psychologist
I recently celebrated forty-nine years of life. Approaching the half-century mark has found me often being in a somewhat reflective mood. I suspect that many of us, as we get older and move beyond those seemingly immortal days of our youth, find ourselves taking a measure of our lives. It has been somewhat surprising to me though when I look back at past romantic relationships to realize that some of the relationships that had a significant impact on my life ended more than 20 years ago. A first girlfriend. A first broken heart. A girlfriend in college that I thought that I would marry. How time flies! I have moved beyond those early relationships and enjoyed other rewarding romantic “entanglements.” I have accepted that I can’t bring myself to give up on love.
Looking back though, I have to admit that as Juice Newton once sang, “Love’s been a little bit hard on me.” When I fall, I fall hard. Sadly, I have sometimes struggled to get beyond the heartbreak that comes with a relationship’s end. I sometimes think that in the midst of a heartbreak I have ranked far below some high functioning alcoholics in my ability to put it all together and get on with the business of living. Those sad days in the darkness can’t be reclaimed and that is a sad truth. From what I have learned though, many of us fall into this trap.
Psychologist Guy Winch confronts us with the reality that our thinking is often flawed when it comes to coping with a broken heart. That leads us to suffer perhaps longer than is necessary. Yet he offers us hope and reassurance that we can break through into the light. I highly recommend that you take some time out of your day to click the link above and watch this video.